stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, ASSININE FUCKING UPS!!!!!! they are such FUCKHOLES and MOTHERFUCKERS, i want to terrorize them and fucking KILL all the GODDAMN INCOMPETENT NINCOMPOOPS THAT WORK THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARGHHHHHHHHH!!

omg, ok so i bought two things: one from sharperimage, the other from dell (mikes xmas present). i thought they were shipping it via fedex, so i had the shipping address go to a fedex hold at location. except, a few days later i found out that they shipped via ups, and fedex will refuse anything ups sends to them (makes sense, why should you accept a hold at location for your competitor). so the packages were both scheduled for delivery on friday. i frantically called thursday, all day, to try and fix this. the first person said that she will put the information on my shipment so that the packages will get sent out to me at the right address. she said someone will call me in an hour to confirm the address. nobody called me in an hour, nobody called me for a while, so i called back, only to my surprise, to find that the address hasnt been changed and it was still going to the wrong place. so then i found out that ups' system cannot take that new shipping address until the packages are AT the local distribution center (aka northbrook, IL) and that while its in transit (on the truck), nothing can be done (stupid system, if you ask me). so i said, fine. i wasnt satisfied with that answer so i tried calling again, hopefully i could speak to someone more knowledgable and who can bypass the system. i get this one guy who tried to do one of the packages, and put me on hold, but HOLY COW - he was dumb enough that he let GO of the damned hold, and so i had to call BACK, and of course, i had NO clue who i spoke to earlier, and had to retell the whole damn story to another girl.

this girl said that there is absolutely and positively NOTHING they can do to the system to reroute the packages, so i have to wait until the next day (delivery day) to call back and tell them (the drivers) where its sposed to go (wtf? isnt that a LITTLE TOO LATE???!!!) but no, she said - thats how the goddamned system work.

ok fine. so i asked when should i call - friday was a long day, i didnt know when they would try to deliver it (by this time, it was 11pm thursday night, my packages were in the distribution center, or on its way, and i was desperate to get them to the right place) she said in the early morning. she said try 7am.

holy fuck. i woke up at 7am, called the 1-800 number, to be told that the package now is at the distribution center, but i cant give them the address because it has to have the "OUT FOR DELIVERY" status on the scan for them to do anything (to reroute it). ok fine - when should i call back? in an hour ...

so i called back in an hour, and was FINALLY able to give them the RIGHT address, and the lady said someone will call back in an hour. someone DID call back in an hour, said that they got the new address and that the packages will be rerouted back to the right address, but it wont go out until monday. FINE, i said.

monday comes. i looked online. lo and fucking behold:

• sharperimage package: went around the WORLD, from northbrook, to the WRONG place (even tho i told them not to go there), got refused (as expected), and is now BACK on its merry way to littler rock, arfuckingsas.
  

• dell package: SOMEHOW, they THOUGHT i wanted this package to be held at the northbrook distribution center and that i personally told them that id pick the package up in five business days (what GIVES???!!!)

oh, jebus.

youve GOT to be FUCKING KIDDING ME RIGHT???!!

i got on the damned phone. talked to one guy. i must have shouted at him, i was so mad - the poor kid must be like, 18 or sth, and had NO clue what to do (kept repeating that the addresses were wrong, the system got it wrong, hes sorry blah-blah-blah) and said hed call back in an hour.

and then i fucking cried, it was so damned frustrating!!! i mean, i was SOO mad, i cried! it was HORRIBLE.

... composed myself ...

got back on the phone, got to a lady, told her the same exact story, SHE said she cant do anything about the sharperimage package, id have to call them to ask for a redelivery to the right address. the dell one, can be put back on the van to be shipped to me. ok, that sounds good. now, can i TALK to a supervisor, please? i need to tell him how fucking awful this entire experience was, how fucking LAME the system is, and how incompetent the call centers were and how utterly unreliable the freaking business model is, given the fact that the rep SAID that the new address is in the system and SOMEONE CALLED ME to say that its good to go for monday!

she put me on hold - got another call from ups (the supervisor from the first person is returning my call) - and he said that he is sorry but the sharperimage one is out of his jurisdiction (yeah, ill jurisdick you fact, cunt), and that id have to settle that with sharperimage, and the dell - he can put it out for delivery tomorrow (good - now i dont have to pay for a $100 cab ride to line up and get this damn thing) said thank you politely, got back on the other line with the second person, said im fine now, and thanks anyways.

FUCKERS!!!!!!!!