i wonder if my parents thought about the possibilities of losing me to another country when they sent me off to come here to study? i wonder if i myself knew that i was going to come to this country to study, and not only to fall in love with the amenities here but to also fall in love, period? i wonder if they had forecasted this, that they would never had let me leave and my life would be something completely and utterly different than it is now?

no sense in wondering really. if i had the ability to jump into my parallel-universes then i would and for fun, observe what i could have, might have been. but the fact of the matter is that i cant. and i love being where i am now. some people say that i should have been in other places (and yes, some say better, and others say worse), but i must say that i am content. and i am attached. i am sorry if i didnt turn out the way that other people 'expect' me to turn out to be. i am sorry if i somehow 'failed' the norms or the mouldings of a certain society, but this is my choice and this is where i want to be.

i have made some kind of inner peace with myself. now i ask others to be peaceful with me. this includes all of you reading this...